Can We Have A Schvitz On It?

I was reading in DCist this morning about Jack Abramoff's problems with the Senate Indian Affairs Committee and his alleged defrauding of Native American tribes, conjoined with his opening of two Kosher eateries in the power corridor:

 

One Committee's Three Hours of Inquiry, in Surreal Time

By Dana Milbank  , Thursday, June 23, 2005; Page A06

Yesterday's Senate hearing into superlobbyist Jack Abramoff's alleged defrauding of Indian tribes had something for everyone...

 

Lobbyist's New Restaurants Put the 'K' in K Street

By ORI NIR  FORWARD STAFF

Washington — Jack Abramoff needed a kosher restaurant in Washington to which to take his clients and congressional contacts. So he created one. Two, actually.  The high-powered lobbyist, one of the most influential in town, says he's that kind of guy. "If I see something I think is wrong, and I care about it, then I go and do something about it," even if it means spending many millions of his own dollars, he said, sipping cream soda at his new deli.

I started thinking about how Abramoff could get himself out of this thundercloud of mistrust and judgment, so I wrote DCist about it:

Since Mr. Abramoff is the kind of guy who says, “If I see something I think is wrong, and I care about it, then I go and do something about it,” I would like to draw his attention to the fact that there is not a single Native American Sweat Lodge available on K Street, or anywhere else in Washington.  A decent sweat lodge would make an ideal setting for business or government power sweats similar to the senators of ancient Rome gathering in the baths.  Think of the progress that could be made when these wheeler dealers and power brokers doff their energy-blocking togs in a cedar scented power schvitz.   When we shed our clothing, we shed our rank, our status and our prejudices.  Skyclad power mongers could cleanse and unchain their spirits in an atmosphere of greater honesty and trust.  Of course, there would have be to some lockers available to protect their wallets and pinky rings from the unscrupulous who might rob them.